If I could go back in time, I would just sit back and enjoy the re-run of my actions. I do not regret a single thing I have done, and I always tell people to do the same because in the end, whatever actions you have taken so far have made you into the person that’s standing here right now. [Yes, even if you aren’t super happy right now, you are alive and healthy!].
You do not have to be a certain way. Read that again. You do not have to be a certain way. If you analyze the concept of the “ideal self”, it is a constant build up and break down of a fluid personality which as humans we tend to have due to the impermanence of our actions.
The more you do, the more fluid you become. Your experiences in life, from the small actions of quotidian life to the dangerous and risky actions taken at turning point life events all lead to the mind-expansion process. A process which, I personally think, is the reason why we are conscious beings to begin with.
We are here to experience and feel as much as we can. Enjoy the good things, understand the bad ones, neither are definitive of who you are as much as they are part of what life is all about. As long as we balance out our emotions to remind ourselves that nothing is permanent, we will be fine.